Like a summer storm, when it is sunny outside but then starts to rain across the street but not where you're standing? It does that here where I live.
I feel like I'm stuck in the middle of something like that right now...except instead of it raining water, it's raining babies.
Life isn't fair.
A friend told me Sunday that she is pregnant again, with baby #5. Another acquaintance made a comment to me while I was out shopping tonight that makes it look like another acquaintance just got an adoptive placement (why else would she be wondering with baited breath and excitement to hear how their court date went, knowing this couple has waited so long?). A friend at church told me about someone her daughter knows -- someone left a baby on her doorstep and wants them to adopt the baby. Another lady at church is pregnant...all three of the advisors in YW have babies (which I admit is is nice because it gives me and another sister in YW with fertility issues some babies to snuggle and we do love that). A few other friends are also pregnant. There are gestating women all around me. It seems like they're coming out of the woodwork again. Lots of women having babies...Lots of women who aren't me.
And we found out this week that the little boy we were hoping to adopt earlier this summer was adopted by another family two weeks ago. Yes, I know that I hadn't said much, if anything, about the possibility of us adopting here on my blog. I didn't want to say anything until things were looking more firm one way or the other. For various reasons, we were unable to proceed with the process beyond a certain point. And the caseworker made it very clear to us that she didn't plan to recommend that the boy be moved out of the state where he is currently living. Well, he has been adopted. And not by us. So I guess it's pretty definite right now that we won't be adopting him.
I thought I had come to terms with this...again. There are times when I'm fine with it and other times when I definitely am not fine with it. I'm in one of those "definitely not fine with it" modes right now. It hurts, physically. Really -- it does.
I'm sad.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Love Is....
*Getting up with the dog at 5:30 a.m. on weekends so I can sleep
*Killing spiders on demand, no matter what time of day or night it is
*Coming to my house to dispose of a dead mouse the dog brought in from outside (GROSS!)
*Letting my girls watch a movie with at their house while I go home and do laundry, dishes, put away groceries, and relax after an incredibly busy day
*Not being totally embarassed by my presence
*Wanting to be tucked in at night
*Killing spiders on demand, no matter what time of day or night it is
*Coming to my house to dispose of a dead mouse the dog brought in from outside (GROSS!)
*Letting my girls watch a movie with at their house while I go home and do laundry, dishes, put away groceries, and relax after an incredibly busy day
*Not being totally embarassed by my presence
*Wanting to be tucked in at night
Bread Recipe
A few people have asked for the bread recipe A is using. It's SO easy, and really good!
1 tbsp. yeast
1/2 tbsp salt
2 cups warm water
1/3 cup oil
1/3 cup honey or brown sugar
approx 5-6 cups flour (can use white, wheat, or both)
Mix first five ingredients in a lg. bowl or stand mixer. Add flour one cup at a time until a soft dough forms. Stir the dough for a minute or two. Let rise for about 45 min. to 1 hour(may need longer for all wheat bread). Separate into two loaf pans. Bake at 350 for 38 minutes.
We've been making it with honey and white flour. Yum!! In fact, A had some friends over on Monday and she made this and they ate both loaves before they ate any of the cookies, chips, etc. So it passes the teenager taste test. LOL
1 tbsp. yeast
1/2 tbsp salt
2 cups warm water
1/3 cup oil
1/3 cup honey or brown sugar
approx 5-6 cups flour (can use white, wheat, or both)
Mix first five ingredients in a lg. bowl or stand mixer. Add flour one cup at a time until a soft dough forms. Stir the dough for a minute or two. Let rise for about 45 min. to 1 hour(may need longer for all wheat bread). Separate into two loaf pans. Bake at 350 for 38 minutes.
We've been making it with honey and white flour. Yum!! In fact, A had some friends over on Monday and she made this and they ate both loaves before they ate any of the cookies, chips, etc. So it passes the teenager taste test. LOL
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Random Thoughts...
Random thoughts for today...
*Arm and Hammer Pet Fresh Odor Eliminator is a wonderful product...but do not use 3/4 of the box at one time. Two hours later and my eyes are still burning. The nasty pet odor is gone, but I'm not sure if it's really gone or if it's just that my sense of smell has been permanently destroyed.
*I love getting a great deal. A and I went shopping this weekend and found a fabulous formal gown for her to wear to an upcoming church dinner/dance -- original price $169...I paid $14.99. Gotta love it! And it will be easy to alter...I found a pattern that is exactly what I want in terms of having sleeves added, and the dress store was able to find the exact same dress for me at another store for the same price so that I can give it to the seamstress to cut up and use to make sleeves. Sometimes you just get really lucky.
*I can't believe how grown-up A looks in that dress. And how tall B has suddenly grown. It makes me realize that my girls are growing up so very, very quickly. The song, "Slipping Through My Fingers" from Mamma Mia comes to mind. I love that song but it always makes me sad. What will my girls remember from their childhood? Will they remember that I was always busy at work, or will they remember that we went to the fair, went shopping together, cooked together...? Will they remember that we tucked them in to bed each night?
*We went to the fair last week and it was fun. I wish the fair came around more than once each year -- I love roasted corn and elephant ears. Much to my surprise, B's favorite ride at the fair was the hang glider ride. The girls like rides that spin. No, thank you.
*Right now my house is full with the sounds of teenagers playing games, listening to music, and hanging out. I want our home to be the kind of home they want to be at...at times I think I'm succeeding...except that I'm succeeding with the kids that aren't mine. LOL Apparently the youth that I work with at church think I'm "cool" and "fun," while I embarrass my own daughter. I guess that's the way life goes.
*A learned how to make bread last week and is making bread for the sacrament each Sunday this month. The recipe is very easy and she does a really good job with it. I'm not sure where my girls got their love of cooking (certainly not from me), but I'm glad they enjoy it!
*Arm and Hammer Pet Fresh Odor Eliminator is a wonderful product...but do not use 3/4 of the box at one time. Two hours later and my eyes are still burning. The nasty pet odor is gone, but I'm not sure if it's really gone or if it's just that my sense of smell has been permanently destroyed.
*I love getting a great deal. A and I went shopping this weekend and found a fabulous formal gown for her to wear to an upcoming church dinner/dance -- original price $169...I paid $14.99. Gotta love it! And it will be easy to alter...I found a pattern that is exactly what I want in terms of having sleeves added, and the dress store was able to find the exact same dress for me at another store for the same price so that I can give it to the seamstress to cut up and use to make sleeves. Sometimes you just get really lucky.
*I can't believe how grown-up A looks in that dress. And how tall B has suddenly grown. It makes me realize that my girls are growing up so very, very quickly. The song, "Slipping Through My Fingers" from Mamma Mia comes to mind. I love that song but it always makes me sad. What will my girls remember from their childhood? Will they remember that I was always busy at work, or will they remember that we went to the fair, went shopping together, cooked together...? Will they remember that we tucked them in to bed each night?
*We went to the fair last week and it was fun. I wish the fair came around more than once each year -- I love roasted corn and elephant ears. Much to my surprise, B's favorite ride at the fair was the hang glider ride. The girls like rides that spin. No, thank you.
*Right now my house is full with the sounds of teenagers playing games, listening to music, and hanging out. I want our home to be the kind of home they want to be at...at times I think I'm succeeding...except that I'm succeeding with the kids that aren't mine. LOL Apparently the youth that I work with at church think I'm "cool" and "fun," while I embarrass my own daughter. I guess that's the way life goes.
*A learned how to make bread last week and is making bread for the sacrament each Sunday this month. The recipe is very easy and she does a really good job with it. I'm not sure where my girls got their love of cooking (certainly not from me), but I'm glad they enjoy it!
Friday, October 10, 2008
7 Things...
Saw this on my sister M's blog and decided to try it...although I'm not going to tag anyone specific, if you read this then please try it on your blog!
I'm supposed to post 7 weird things about myself. (If only there were only 7 weird things....)
1. I am terrified of elevators. To the point that I will willing walk up as many flights of stairs as necessary to avoid elevators...once I walked up 9 flights to a doctor's office to avoid the elevator.
2. I roll my lips in and bite down when concentrating...Ouch!
3. I like ranch dressing on french fries, chicken nuggets, and baked potatoes.
4. I can't stand to have wrinkled, messy bedding but I hate to make the bed. Even if I don't make the bed in the morning, I have to pull the pillowcases, sheets, and comforter straight on my side of the bed before I get in.
5. Poor grammar and sloppy enunciation drive me absolutely crazy.
6. I have to concentrate hard to say Massachusetts correctly.
7. I notice people's eyebrows...whether they're kept trimmed, plucked, waxed, etc...don't know why, but I am fanatical about my eyebrows looking good. LOL
I'm supposed to post 7 weird things about myself. (If only there were only 7 weird things....)
1. I am terrified of elevators. To the point that I will willing walk up as many flights of stairs as necessary to avoid elevators...once I walked up 9 flights to a doctor's office to avoid the elevator.
2. I roll my lips in and bite down when concentrating...Ouch!
3. I like ranch dressing on french fries, chicken nuggets, and baked potatoes.
4. I can't stand to have wrinkled, messy bedding but I hate to make the bed. Even if I don't make the bed in the morning, I have to pull the pillowcases, sheets, and comforter straight on my side of the bed before I get in.
5. Poor grammar and sloppy enunciation drive me absolutely crazy.
6. I have to concentrate hard to say Massachusetts correctly.
7. I notice people's eyebrows...whether they're kept trimmed, plucked, waxed, etc...don't know why, but I am fanatical about my eyebrows looking good. LOL
Relax? What's That?
OK, so the concensus appears to be that I don't know how to relax. Yeah, that's probably true.
I took a few days off work while DH and the girls are on Fall Break from school. The girls and I spent yesterday getting their hair cuts, then off to the fair. I love fair food...it doesn't love me, but I love it. I was pretty good and had only a few curly fries, some roasted corn, a caramel apple, and a huge elephant ear. I only ate about 1/3 of the elephant ear but it was SO good! And why is it that caramel apples at the fair taste better than anywhere else? Or when I make them myself? Hmmmmmm.... After the fair I went to a book club meeting (first time). Then home.
Anyway, most people wouldn't think of that as a relaxing day. Really, for me it was. I was spending time with my girls, not at work, and watching them have fun. It doesn't get much better than that for me (unless there is shopping involved).
Today has been a lazy morning so far...I've been working on cleaning off the eating bar in the kitchen and am getting ready to run errands. I'd like to get my kitchen really cleaned today...we'll see how that goes. LOL
Relax...I guess it just means something different to me than it means to most people!
I took a few days off work while DH and the girls are on Fall Break from school. The girls and I spent yesterday getting their hair cuts, then off to the fair. I love fair food...it doesn't love me, but I love it. I was pretty good and had only a few curly fries, some roasted corn, a caramel apple, and a huge elephant ear. I only ate about 1/3 of the elephant ear but it was SO good! And why is it that caramel apples at the fair taste better than anywhere else? Or when I make them myself? Hmmmmmm.... After the fair I went to a book club meeting (first time). Then home.
Anyway, most people wouldn't think of that as a relaxing day. Really, for me it was. I was spending time with my girls, not at work, and watching them have fun. It doesn't get much better than that for me (unless there is shopping involved).
Today has been a lazy morning so far...I've been working on cleaning off the eating bar in the kitchen and am getting ready to run errands. I'd like to get my kitchen really cleaned today...we'll see how that goes. LOL
Relax...I guess it just means something different to me than it means to most people!
Sunday, October 5, 2008
You Have Got to be Kidding Me!
OK, I know this is ridiculous and is truly not a problem in the grand scheme of things...but it annoyed the heck out of me last night and so now you get to hear all about it!
This weekend in General Conference for church. That means we get to sleep in on Sunday, watch TV at home, and spend the day together as a family. I love conference weekend. And, in my family, we have a traditional Sunday morning conference meal -- monkey bread and orange juice. And Wal-Mart carries (well, I should say carried) this lovely pre-made monkey bread that just had to be popped in the microwave for a few minutes and then -- voila -- it was done!
So last night, after an already long day, when I could barely breathe and was exhausted, I headed off to Wal-Mart to buy our monkey bread. I took along with me a list of a few other items that we needed to get through until I'm off work at the end of next week...
Now, I don't like Wal-Mart. Really, truly, I don't. Yes, they have good prices. But they don't have the selection that my favorite grocery store has, the aisles are not wide enough nor are they very well lit, and it's just a messy store in general. But off to Wal-Mart I went. At 7:30 p.m. on a Saturday night. Not a fun time to be there.
Two of the items on my list: monkey bread and frozen egg rolls. And guess what Wal-Mart no longer carries? Monkey bread and frozen egg rolls. Yes, really -- I am sure -- I must have walked up and down the freezer section aisles 5 times, carefully scrutinizing every shelf, every item, ever possible space for monkey bread and egg rolls. To no avail.
The girls and I were really looking forward to monkey bread this morning. Instead, frozen cinnamon rolls had to suffice.
*Sigh* Guess I'll just have to start making it from scratch now.
This weekend in General Conference for church. That means we get to sleep in on Sunday, watch TV at home, and spend the day together as a family. I love conference weekend. And, in my family, we have a traditional Sunday morning conference meal -- monkey bread and orange juice. And Wal-Mart carries (well, I should say carried) this lovely pre-made monkey bread that just had to be popped in the microwave for a few minutes and then -- voila -- it was done!
So last night, after an already long day, when I could barely breathe and was exhausted, I headed off to Wal-Mart to buy our monkey bread. I took along with me a list of a few other items that we needed to get through until I'm off work at the end of next week...
Now, I don't like Wal-Mart. Really, truly, I don't. Yes, they have good prices. But they don't have the selection that my favorite grocery store has, the aisles are not wide enough nor are they very well lit, and it's just a messy store in general. But off to Wal-Mart I went. At 7:30 p.m. on a Saturday night. Not a fun time to be there.
Two of the items on my list: monkey bread and frozen egg rolls. And guess what Wal-Mart no longer carries? Monkey bread and frozen egg rolls. Yes, really -- I am sure -- I must have walked up and down the freezer section aisles 5 times, carefully scrutinizing every shelf, every item, ever possible space for monkey bread and egg rolls. To no avail.
The girls and I were really looking forward to monkey bread this morning. Instead, frozen cinnamon rolls had to suffice.
*Sigh* Guess I'll just have to start making it from scratch now.
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